White Ladder
by Hayla
Summary: A collection of shounen ai / yaoi songfics based on the songs and lyrics from David Gray's latest album, White Ladder.
1. A Letter to the Reader

****

White Ladder

(an album based songfiction collection)

by **Hayla**

Dear Reader,

**_White Ladder_ **is a collection of songfics all based around the anime series **_Ronin Warriors / Yoroiden Samurai Troopers_**. I had this idea awhile back to do a series of song fics all from one album by a particular artists. I guess you could call it an _album-fic_ because all the songs that I use are from **David Gray**'s most recent album **_White Ladder_**, which goes to explain the title of this anthology.

I don't know why, but **David Gray**'s work has really inspired me lately. In a jaded world of bubble gum bands and manufactured hits, the singer/songwriter is an endangered breed of artist. (yeah... I am beginning to preach to you... ^.~) If you at all become intrigued by the lyrics I suggest giving him a listen. It was like a breath of fresh air to me! Very few artists have my undying support like he does. 

Anyway, each of the following fictions are separate stories. They do not really connect to each other in any other fashion then the lyrics. All the stories are also proudly shounen ai, so don't say I didn't tell you so. There will be nine stories, each one taking their title from a track on the album and published in sequence (i.e. track 1 on the album is chapter 1 of the collection). I am, as of right now, only writing nine installments. The only song that I am leaving out is **_Say Hello, Wave Goodbye_**. It has nothing to do with the quality of the song, actually quite the reverse. But, I couldn't come up with a decent storyline for the song and also it is the _only _song that doesn't have lyrics in the lyric book! I kinda wonder if it was actually ever intended to go on the album in the first place! Also left out is the very last track **_Babylon II_** because it is just a remixed version of the song **_Babylon_**, an earlier track on the album. But I might just do a different story to the same song... who knows!

Anyway, it doesn't really matter. Like I said, there are going to be roughly nine stories, so please check back frequently! And if you like what you read, please leave me a review. I would really appreciate it. I love emails, too, so don't be afraid to write me suggestions and/or constructive criticisms.... whatever! Hell, if you are familiar with **David Gray **at all and would like to make a future story suggestion, go for it! I have ideas planned out, but nothing is ever definite!

The standard disclaimer applies to both **David Gray** and **_Ronin Warriors_**. Depending on the situation, I may switch back and forth between American and Japanese names, so here is a quick and easy guide for those unfamiliar with either pair: **Ryo of Wildfire**= **Rekka no Ryo**; **Cye of the Torrent **= **Suiko no Shin**; **Kento of Hardrock **= **Kongo no Shuu**; **Rowen of Strata **= **Tenku no Touma**; **Sage of the Halo **= **Korin no Seiji**. If I use any other characters, I will let you know. There is also no set pairings that I follow. Just whoever the lyrics inspired was who I used! But in the meantime, go forward and enjoy!

~_Love and Inspiration_, **Hayla**


	2. Please Forgive Me

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Please Forgive Me

by Hayla

~*~

Ryo breathed heavily, gulping desperately for the air that alluded him so fiercely. He bent down, hands coming to rest on his knees. Wild, raven dark locks stuck out in every direction, clinging to his forehead with sweat. With hungry eyes he glanced left and then right, perspiration dripping from his brow, down to the edge of his nose, then falling unnoticed to the ground.

"Alright," he muttered under his breath, wiping his face with dirty palms, playing out his role with phantom opponents. As if a sudden burst of energy and enthusiasm coursed through his body all at once, he jumped up to a ready position, muscles taut and ready for action, arms outstretched out of habit to advert possible attacks, even if they didn't exist at this point in time.

He could hear the crowd begin to cheer wildly, hear his teammates yelling encouragement to him from the sidelines. These were the final seconds of the most important game of his life. All the pressure was on him, on this goal. _One point_... all he needed was to get one single goal in this overtime match and the championship was theirs.

He clapped his hands together quickly, signaling that he was prepared. He began to run, feet beating down on the well-trodden grass. Within seconds the one time warrior found the black and white ball between his feet. With speed and accuracy, he dribbled back and forth.

_Fake left..._ He could feel all eyes on him, all breath was abated with the final outcome in this no score match. _One point..._ Everything became slow motion, his body weary, the air in his lungs labored. _Fake right..._

The goalie stood there waiting for him, crouched down like a feral animal, eyes slits, teeth bared and waiting for his arrival.

With one final burst of energy, he moved his one leg, feeling it lift backwards slightly before flying forth, releasing all the pent up strength he had left in the reserves of his body. The flying kick assaulted the tattered ball, sailing it forward with blinding speed. He paused... watching... waiting...

Seconds that crept by like minutes passed before the crowd suddenly exploded in exaltation. 

"Goal!" He screamed incoherently with excitement, jumping wildly up and down, fists clutched in the air. "And the crowd goes wild!

"That's right," he retorted fiercely to unheard comments from an imaginary opponent, dancing madly in place. "Who's your daddy!"

"_Ackhem_..." 

Within a millisecond flat Ryo was brought crashingly back to reality. He paused mid-victory dance, disbelief filling him, to slowly turn and face the invader of his daydream. He froze immediately.

Sage lifted one thin eyebrow up in amusement as he picked up the stray soccer ball that rolled its way to his feet. The blonde headed slowly toward the bearer of Wildfire, a sway of self-assurance in every step. "Who's your..._ daddy_?" He asked in a bemused voice, gently tossing the ball to a much-stunned Ryo.

He caught the ball easily with instinct, the dark haired man blushing despite himself. He bent his head down, trying to cover his embarrassment. "Oh, hiya Sage. Didn't know... ahh... anyone was home."

"Got out of work early, thought I would catch a game," the warrior of light offered as his only explanation of his surprise observance to Ryo's fantasy. He was clearly amused by what he saw and, in his own way, reveled at the chance to catch Ryo at a moment of insecurity. It was a very unusual thing... very un-Ryo-like. 

The fire warrior shifted uncomfortably, all of a sudden finding his untied shoe a matter of extreme importance, deserving all of his forced attention. He nervously bounced the soccer ball from one palm to the other. He could feel his heart beating rapidly under his Umbro jersey and it wasn't because of the false game he had just concluded. _I can't believe he was standing there... watching..._

"Not a bad shot," Sage began as he took off his light jacket and tossed it nearby. He carefully undid the top buttons of his shirt, loosening up his tight fitting work clothes. "Let's see if you can make it two for two."

Ryo's eyes shot up, connecting instantly with curious pale purple. He felt his heart leap into his throat. The connection was so intense that he had to look immediately away before he lost total control of a valid form of speech. _Why did I have to make an ass out of myself in front of him..._

"Uh... sure Sage..."

**__**

Please forgive me if I act a little strange,

For I know not what I do,

Feels like lightening running through my veins,

Everytime I look at you,

Everytime I look at you...

Ryo quietly mumbled a few incoherent curses to himself under his breath as he took a few steps back, feeling completely awkward and losing an important connection between mind and body. He stumbled a few times before making it half way across the yard.

"Ready?" He called out to his flesh and blood opponent, a slight edge of shakiness to his voice.

As an answer, Sage bent down slightly, arms out in preparation of the possible goal. He nodded once, a tight smile fighting its way to the corner of his lips.

Ryo dropped the ball in front of him, slowly dribbling it down the short distance between the two, gaining speed and confidence with every step. In what seemed like an eternity Ryo found himself an acceptable distance away from Sage. He wouldn't let the warrior of the Halo sit there so smug... he would show him what a great player he really was, no doubt. This attempt wouldn't be blocked by the likes of him.

Again he lifted his leg, forcing so much attention to the point of making Sage eat his haughty words and at least, on Ryo's part, show off a little, that he forgot one key fact... his shoe was still untied...

As he lifted his leg back to send the ball to its well-determined goal, his other foot came to rest upon the stray lace. In an almost unbelievable fashion seen only in slap-stick movies, adding to it the factors of speed from running, Ryo found himself flying head over heels, landing hard on his back, then skidding a few feet further to a stuttering halt.

All the air left his lungs in a great _whoosh_ and his eyesight blurred as the sharp contact with the hard ground sent a series of multiple aches coercing momentarily through his body. He laid there, completely dumbfounded and in a state of utter shock.

"Ryo," Sage called out in concern, instantly bending over the fallen man. "Hey, are you all right?"

_The ground... I'm lying flat on my back... on the ground..._

Ryo tried to form words, trying not to make the situation any more degrading then it already was. What he thought were the well-formed sentences of - _Yeah, I'm fine. Never been better _- turned into a confusing ramble of gibberish that sounded completely foreign even to his own ears. He hadn't regained his breath or his brain back in enough time to answer properly.

Sage stared down at him for a moment, a puzzled look written clearly over his face as he tried to make sense of the leader's ramblings. But, slowly a chuckle escaped his throat, and he almost as quickly began to laugh heartily out loud - a deep, soulful laugh from the bottom of his being. Pretty soon, tears were streaming down his face, as he no longer tried to hold back his sheer amusement at the price of Ryo's blunders.

Sage reached his hand down in an attempt to pull Ryo to his feet, but failed miserably as his body was too weak with uncontrollable laughter. He only succeeded enough to pull Ryo to a sitting position before falling to the ground in a similar posture across from the would-be soccer hero.

Ryo felt miserable. He sat totally dejected, his breath regaining slowly to a pace of normalcy. His face was so crimson with embarrassment that it would have even put the color of his armor to shame. 

"It's... not... funny," he managed to say deadpan, his eyes slowly taking in the detail of the green marks from grass that now stained his legs and shorts. _Please stop laughing... why did it have to be you..._

This only made Sage laugh harder. He gently grasped Ryo's face in his hand, drawing his attention back up to him. Between sobs of laughter, he breathlessly reenacted Ryo's great mishap, indicating the flip, crash, then slide aspect of his fall with his hands. He gripped Wildfire's shoulders forcefully, eyes brimming with joy and laughter, embracing, in a way, and wishing to share the sweet revelry. 

"It's really _not_ funny..." But a tiny smile began to trace the crestfallen warrior's lips. He actually couldn't remember when the last time it was, if ever, that he had heard Sage laugh so loudly and free, so full of the element that made him one with his armor. It lifted his heart to hear it, to see Sage like this.

The blonde warrior shook his head slowly, trying in vain to agree with Ryo's distressed request. He stifled his chuckles for a moment, pale eyes filled with unadulterated amusement seeking out the cobalt blue of Ryo's. 

Just the way Sage looked at Ryo for that moment was enough to send shivers down the dark haired warrior's body. It filled him with that overwhelming sense of joy... and suddenly, he didn't care about how much of a fool he had made of himself. Because, within Sage's eyes was the ultimate acceptance of who he was. Sage wasn't laughing at his blunders, but embracing the character and humor within Ryo.

In that moment of shared silence between them, there was a spark of hope re-ignited within Ryo for something he had almost given up on long ago. Simultaneously, they both soon broke into fits of laughter, fresh tears streaming freely on both their faces as they laid in the grass, living up life, and not caring how out of character either of them was. 

**__**

Help me out here all my words are falling short,

And there's so much I want to say,

Want to tell you just how good it feels,

When you look at me that way,

When you look at me that way...

Ryo emerged from the bathroom, hot steam from the shower spilling into the cool hallway. With bathrobe wrapped securely around his body, hands rubbing the white towel through damp locks in an attempt to dry them, Ryo headed to his room.

He could smell the tell tale signs of Cye's cooking as it wafted potently from down the stairs. His stomach rumbled hungrily at the thought of a good meal after such a long day.

As he passed down the carpeted hallway, he passed Sage's room. The door was halfway cracked. Ryo paused, leaning an intent ear forward, listening for sounds of life within the dark room. It was dead quiet... If Rowen were in, he would surely be listening to his favorite night show on the radio by now. But there were no static sounds from within the room... even-

"You're making a puddle."

Ryo jumped at the sound of Sage's voice from beyond the doorway. Soft as it was, he hadn't expected anyone to have been in the room. That made it twice in the very same day that the blonde had scared the hell out of the fire ronin.

Baffled by Sage's seeming omnipotence, Ryo looked down to the floor. Indeed, he hadn't really fully dried off from his shower yet, and dark, wet footprints followed him to his present station. He stuck his head in the half open door, eyes adjusting quickly to the darkness of the inner room as compared to the semi-lit hallway.

"Sorry Sage, I didn't realize tha-"

"In or out."

"Uh..." Ryo shifted, coherent thought leaving him for a second. "In," he said eventually as he quickly stepped into the quiet room.

"Close the door, please," Sage said in the same soft voice from across the room. 

Ryo quickly obeyed, not even questioning why it was open in the first place if he had wanted privacy. He made his way slowly across the room to where Sage was sitting. There were a few candles lit around the room, but their illumination was minimal at best.

Sage sat on the ledge of the window, one knee brought up to his chest while the other leg swung freely, foot merely brushing the carpeted floor. He was silhouetted by the fiery colors of the setting sun behind him. His violet eyes, hidden from Ryo's view, were cast on the quickly changing horizon.

The bearer of Wildfire stopped just a few feet from his fellow Ronin and waited. He tried to casually look around the room, noting the piles of books, disheveled papers, and unmade bed of Rowen's half to the sparsely decorated, perfectly ordered section of Sage's.

Minutes past before words were spoken. Meanwhile Ryo's thoughts ran ramped through his already cluttered mind. _Why did Sage invite me in here?_ He shifted his weight uncomfortably. _I wonder where Rowen is._

"Have you ever taken the time to actually watch the sun set?" Sage's voice was quiet, reflective, like he was discovering some hidden meaning in the setting day that he wished to share.

Ryo's tiger-like eyes sought out to capture the fading light, realizing for the first time how beautiful the sun reflected off the glittering surface of the lake hidden deep somewhere in the dense forest that surrounded the house.

"No, I don't think I ever really have," he answered awe struck. It truly was a breathtaking view he had never bothered to appreciate before.

"Neither have I," the bearer of Halo said quietly, his voice dropping suddenly to that of a mere whisper. "I never bothered to see the beauty in everything around me."

Ryo took a small step forward, hand reaching to grasp the shoulder of the warrior of light. This sudden change in mood from the usually unflappable man was disturbing at best. 

"What's wro-" Before he could even get a full sentence out, the blonde turned to face him, intense eyes locking immediately. Ryo could feel the heat intensify in his face, unable to hide that lightening-like vibe that pulsated suddenly between them.

Unexpectedly, old feelings that Ryo had long since pushed aside and tried to forget were brought fresh to the surface. _If only you knew, Sage._ How long had he wanted to share his feelings with the warrior of wisdom, share his true emotions... _But he was always so distant until now..._

His heart pounded in his ears, and he could feel his breath drawing short as the length of time grew longer. It shocked Ryo to no end to discover that Sage was not looking away from the intense stare, or even flinching at best. But behind the light violet, within the pools of light that shimmered like the setting sun, was something else... _something_...

"Sage..."

**__**

Throw a stone and watch the ripples flow,

Moving out across the bay,

Like a stone I fall into your eyes,

Deep into that mystery,

Deep into some mystery...

"We should see if dinner is ready," Sage offered quickly before Ryo was able to complete his thought, breaking the lock they had shared for the longest of moments. He quickly got up from the ledge, brushing past a distraught Ryo.

_What was that all about? _

Sage was almost at the door, his hand already grasping the doorknob, before Ryo was able to find his voice again.

"Wait." The tone was firm, no longer containing the bumbling uneasiness that had so plagued him all day. Ryo turned to face his abruptly fleeing companion, determination filling his being.

He hadn't imagined at all the connection that they had just experienced. It wasn't wishful thinking or the offshoot of a pent up crush. There was just a discovery of the secrets that had hidden themselves deeply within Sage's eyes. He had found something mutual in the violet hues of that heated gaze.

It was disbelief, turned to fascination, turned dramatically to something else... something deeper and more meaningful that burned intensely through the warrior of fire. He couldn't contain his words, couldn't even attempt to understand what needed to be said. It was the prospect of something long since given up that threatened to scream out into the silent stillness of the room.

He once again took the small steps to close the precious distance between them, hand reaching out to the door handle, covering the paleness of Sage's hand, once and for all securing the room from possible retreat.

"Sage-"

"Don't Ryo..." The blonde cut him off, refusing to acknowledge Wildfire's intense stare. His pale purple eyes were intent on the contact of hands as they rested on the hidden brass knob. The touch was electrifying, but he couldn't go through with his desire, he couldn't let himself be opened vulnerable again... _not to you, Ryo..._

It was the small hint of something more that led the dark haired man to ignore Sage's warning. With extreme gentleness, he let his hand fall slowly from the handle, brushing over the pale skin of Sage's wrist, arm... slowly sliding up to the thin shoulder, to the sensitive skin of the blonde's neck before tracing a finger to his chin, gently forcing Sage's eyes upward.

"Why not?" In that instant, Ryo knew that this was right... that everything that he had been dreading for so long was all in vain. There was passion behind those long dark lashes... there was a fire there as well. Ryo could almost not contain himself as the joy of this revelation filled him. He no longer needed to hide his feelings in shame, or live within a lie, because the mutuality of it all was truly startling.

"I can't stand the thought of..." Sage's once calm visage was troubled in thought as he tried to express his fears. Sage closed his eyes, blocking out the sight of the open gift in front of him. He knew what he was afraid of, knew what had stopped him long ago from acting on the obvious attraction between them. "I... I don't want... I'm afraid... afraid to lose you."

The weight of Sage's words hit Ryo like a ton of bricks. _Could everything that I ever dreamed really been true all along?_ Only one thought persisted in this startling confession. "Why would you ever lose me?"

**__**

I got half a mind to scream out loud,

I got half a mind to die,

So I won't have to lose you good,

Won't every have to say goodbye...

"I'm afraid that once you see who I am, once you know, that you will leave... that you won't care and-"

"Shh..." Ryo placed a silencing finger on Sage's rambling lips. "All I have ever wanted was you." Ryo moved closer, causing their bodies to come in contact with each other, their faces merely inches apart. "Just you... no pretending..."

Ryo could only think of one way to let Sage know undoubtedly that he shared the same fears... the same apprehension. Slowly, he moved his finger away, leaning forward to place curious lips over Sage's mouth instead, sealing a mutual promise that would link them together in more ways then either thought possible.

_ ****_

I won't ever have to lie,

Won't ever have to say goodbye...

Sage finally released the door, which he had secretly been clinging to like a lifeline. He let his hands both wander into the wetness of Ryo's dark locks, pulling him deeper into the passionate kiss, wild abandonment left to instinct.

"Dinner!" 

Cye's voice from downstairs caused the both of them to jump at the unexpected sound, bringing them back to the reality that they weren't truly alone in this perfect moment.

Ryo finally had enough sense to pull back a little, realizing in slight embarrassment that he had gotten a good portion of Sage's own clothes wet from his pressing and freshly bathed body. _Maybe the shower wasn't such a good idea..._

Ryo stifled a small laugh as Sage glanced down at his clothes. The blonde staring down in slight annoyance, mumbling something about ruining a perfect moment. 

By this time, it was Ryo's turn to laugh out loud. Sage, in an attempt to brush dry his clothes, only compounded the problem as he came to discover that his hands were just as wet from Ryo's hair as his clothes were.

"Damn," he mumbled slightly distraught, but not too angry given the circumstances. But he could feel the way Ryo looked at him, and in the end, that's all that mattered. Everything else was irrelevant...

Sage looked up suddenly, eyes glittering in amusement. "Well," he said slowly, a cocky smile on his face. "At least I _am _dressed."

"Wha..." Ryo looked down to see that during their moment of shared passion, his robe had fallen off his shoulder and had come undone in the front, almost revealing him completely. He turned crimson again, embarrassed for a moment until he glanced up to feel the violet electricity tingle across his flesh.

**__**

Please forgive me if I act a little strange

For I know not what I do

Feels like lightening running through my veins

Everytime I look at you

With a shy smile, he stepped back, quickly beginning the task of covering himself once again. 

"No," Sage whispered lowly, his cool hand stopping Ryo's from retying the white sash. Slowly, he brought his hands over Ryo's tanned chest to come and rest on his shoulders. With deliberate delicacy, he pushed back the remaining white cotton, letting it fall to Ryo's waist, freeing his arms from the robe's sleeves. Sage took a moment to take in the way Ryo looked in the fading colors of sunset that filled the room. And he knew the feeling of want was there, as it had always been...

_ ****_

Everytime I look at you..

Sage pushed forward. This time he made the move, liking the way the fire ronin fit so well into his embrace, Ryo's arms wrapped around his neck, naked torso feeling glorious next to Sage's body.

Now there was no fear, no need to dance around with lies and confusion. The feeling in the two souls was undeniable, the need ever apparent. The light of day would fade, but a new night would surely rise, and both knew that the other would be there, regardless.

Cye called out again for dinner, this time unheard - the only sound in the room being that of a click of a lock, the rustle of hastily discarded garments, the slight giving of a bed, and the release of pure emotion.

~end

Please leave a review... even if it is only a word or two, I would really appreciate it! ^.~

Coming next..._ **Babylon**_


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